


when you're alone in the dark

by never_bloom_again



Series: some kind of disaster [2]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Luke angst, M/M, Nightmares, insecure luke alvez, spencer reid is an awesome boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:08:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27673151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/never_bloom_again/pseuds/never_bloom_again
Summary: luke, for the first time since spencer has slept over, has one of his worst nightmares. he just needs comfort, but is too scared to ask.
Relationships: Luke Alvez/Spencer Reid
Series: some kind of disaster [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2007031
Comments: 6
Kudos: 78





	when you're alone in the dark

Luke’s eyes slowly blinked open as he sat up, adjusting to the soft yellow glow of the nightlight on the opposite side of the bed. He tried to slow down his rapid breathing as he reminded himself that he was safe, in his bedroom, and that Spencer was alive and okay, asleep peacefully next to him.

His mind would not stop racing with the remnants of the terrifying thoughts that had haunted him in his sleep, no matter how much he focused on breathing in and then out slowly. Luke looked over at Spencer, lying next to him. Luke’s eyes were fixated on him, looking so angelic, so calm and perfect, and Luke watched the rise and fall of his chest, his only proof that Spencer was alive, and not dead, as his head had been insisting just mere moments ago, and would not stop trying to persuade him.

The thought would not leave his brain, the image his mind had built of Spencer, dead, was seemingly permanently ingrained there. Luke reached to the bedside table to get his phone, from which he hoped he would find a little bit of comfort.

It was, after all, what he would normally do when he had nightmares - he would try and calm himself down, be that by cuddling Roxy when he was alone, or when Spencer was there, watching him sleep contently, and regardless of whether he was alone or not, scrolling through his phone, just looking at photos of Spencer, some with him, some with Roxy, some with the team. It didn’t matter, as long as they had Spencer in them. 

Normally that reminder of his boyfriend would be enough to calm him, at least to the point where he could sleep, but the photos didn’t seem to be doing anything to help, nor did anything else he would usually do, so he put the phone back, and tried lying back down, his heart still racing.

For a moment, he considered waking Spencer up, although he quickly dismissed it - Spencer hated it when Luke woke him up any earlier than 10am on days when they did not have work, so he would obviously detest it if Luke were to wake him up at 4 in the morning, for no reason other than his brain being stupid. Their relationship, while it had been going on for months, had still not been long enough that Luke was confident it would survive Spencer discovering his flaws, such as his restless mind that would require Luke to wake him up in order to rest.

He tried to curl himself up smaller, pull the covers tighter, and even get as close to Spencer as he could, without waking him up. While it provided him some comfort to be curled up somewhat close to Spencer, it wasn’t enough to persuade his mind that Spencer was fine, that he could sleep. Luke just wanted to hear his voice, to have Spencer reassure him that not only was he himself okay, but that everything was going to be okay, because it didn’t feel like it.

Tears began to well in his eyes, as he tried to hold them back. Everything just felt  _ wrong _ , his mind was driving him wild. Luke couldn’t deal with this, not that night - he almost wished Spencer was gone so that he didn’t have to worry about accidentally waking him up or upsetting him - one of the reasons Spencer had said that he liked sleeping at Luke’s was that he slept more peacefully, and being woken up by your boyfriend crying at 4am was far from peaceful. 

However, all Luke really wanted was to no longer be alone in the darkness of his mind, and of his room, and Spencer could change that. 

A tear slid down Luke’s cheek, despite his efforts to stop it, and it didn’t take long before there were more, streaming down his face. Luke sat up, moving away from Spencer, an attempt to avoid him hearing the little sniffles that Luke could no longer hold back.

He couldn’t do it anymore. Luke just needed the comfort, so he reached out and lightly touched Spencer’s shoulder, his hands racing back to lap, all balled up.

“Luke? What’s going on?” Spencer asked, his voice soft and slightly scratchy from sleep. “Why did you wake me up this early?”

Spencer’s final question was more of a groan than anything else; Luke’s hands went into even tighter fists, his nails digging into the palm of his hand, which only made his crying louder. Of course he had woken Spencer up, and of course Spencer was annoyed.

It does help him slightly to hear Spencer’s voice though - his mind now able to trust that even if Spencer was unhappy with him, at least he was alive and safe, in bed.

“I’m sorry for waking you up, Spence - go back to sleep.”

But Luke’s voice was rough and wavering, affected badly by his tears, and Spencer, even in his half-asleep state, could tell that something wasn’t right, and turned to look at him, frowning.

“Love, are you okay?”

Luke shook his head, but only slightly, as though ashamed to admit it.

“Can I, uh, can you hold me?” Luke questioned nervously, as though it was likely Spencer was going to say no.

Spencer didn’t even bother responding, and as Luke lay back down, pulled him close, close enough that Luke could feel his body heat.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, but can you just talk? About anything, I don’t mind.”

His words were muffled by Spencer’s shirt, which he had rested his face in, but Spencer quickly agreed, and started softly rambling about something that Luke was too exhausted to determine.

It didn’t take long before Luke was asleep, his mind finally conceding that it had lost, that Spencer had saved him from his nightmares, and if from that night on, Spencer let Luke have Roxy in bed with him, neither of them would mention that it was for comfort.

After all, no real reason was needed for Spencer to persuade Luke to let her.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed! i will hopefully write more of this series soon, if you have any specific ideas you'd like to see, let me know!! :)


End file.
